Test Stress!!!

This happened to me last Sunday night while driving my stepson home. I've been meaning to post it, but my life is a bit topsy turvy right now and blogging has NOT been a priority for me. I have to take a big state test this coming Saturday (November 1st) which I need to pass before I can even GET INTO a teaching credential program. It covers all material taught from grades K-12. Oh yeah, and I graduated high school in 1983, so most of this stuff I studied well over 20 years ago. Try cramming all that into your now middle-aged brain and making it stick. And there are only 26 questions (plus 2 short answer) for each subject! So how the hell do you know where to focus? The answer is, you don't. And you end up having a panic attack (fake heart attack) while driving your stepson home. So here is what happened that night.....

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Okay, so there I am having to drive my stepson home (hubby got called in to work OT), and I started to feel funny. Tingly arms and legs, profuse sweating in back of my neck and underarms, trembling hands, etc. Uh oh, I think my blood sugar must have bottomed out. This has only happened to me like a handful of times (a couple of times while pregnant when I didn't eat enough) and more recently a few months ago while my mom was here. Each time, I have had to get something to eat right away and sit down until the "episode" passed. But never has it happened while driving.

So, I call dh (who is a firefighter, BTW) to tell him I don't feel well. I get off at the next exit to get something to eat. 1.5 chocolate brownies later, and I'm feeling a little better, but still not 100%. I call dh's ex-wife to tell her we will be late since I don't feel well and am not ready to drive yet (forget the fact she does not offer to meet me to pick up her son, but...)

Okay, so I decide after about 15 minutes I need to just suck it up and get him home. So we get to his house, and the smell of the food I bought the kids is making me so nauseous I tell him to take all the trash in the house or I will throw up when we get there. So I call my mom after I drop him off and am driving home. I still don't feel well, and have even unbuttoned my pants since I just feel sick to my stomach. About 10-15 min after getting on the freeway, the tingling starts again in my hands and feet....accompanied by shortness of breath, sweating and more shakes. My mom says I sound faint. I need to get off the freeway (from the carpool lane). I get off, pull into a gas station and call 911. Feel like I am going to pass out. Having a hard time catching my breath. Am I having a heart attack? We will soon see....

So here comes 1) the ambulance, 2) the rescue squad, and yes, finally 3) the fire truck! By now, Katie is crying when she sees all this action, and she now says she has to pee. I am taken out of the car and put on the gurney (while frantically struggling to zip my pants) , soothe Katie, and calm Michael down, who is all excited to see all the firemen. Luckily, there is a female paramedic and she stands at the car door talking to Katie and getting her calmed down. So they're putting all these monitors on me, asking me my age, medical history, etc. The guys are all shaking their heads and saying my vitals are normal. BP is fine, I ask them to check my blood sugar, that seems okay (forget that I've just eaten 1 1/2 brownies and a soda!). So the captain asks my age again and says (with a wink) that his wife is around the same age and just started to have hot flashes. I am going, oh no, please do NOT tell me all this was for a hot flash! Of course now, I am feeling perfectly fine but am completely mortified and ready to crawl under the gurney. Katie still has to pee. Crap!

So the nice firemen stay and wait near my car (apparently I am NOT in a good neighborhood) while I take Katie to the bathroom. They joke with me that I just wanted to see all the hot firemen. I am telling them my husband will never let me live this down.

Oh yeah, did I mention that the 911 dispatch center called dh's fire station (because I had the kids with me and told them if they came to take me away he would have to leave work to get the kids), and they said they were going to transport me and so they shut down the truck at his station? (he is on the truck and if they are a man short, the truck gets shut down). Oh yeah, this is one giant fubar. I call him back and tell him they are NOT taking me anywhere and to stay at work.

The firemen kept asking me if I was under a lot of stress or worried about something. I almost started laughing. Oh, you mean like not having any money and studying for this test? Why no, everything is peachy!

I feel like an idiot. At least I didn't get them all out of bed for this! Good grief! Like a hysterical swooning female from the 19th century. Help, I've got the vapors, come save me!

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So that is what has been happening in my neck of the woods.....now you can see why I have been MIA all over the place. Good grief!!!!

Light the Night Walk 2008

We participated in the 2008 Light the Night walk to benefit the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. The kids and I had a blast! Thanks to all who supported me. Our team raised over $6500!

Bailout My Arse

*(Deep, heavy, disgusted SIGH)* Okay, so let me preface this entry by stating that I am in no way a financial guru. Yes, I am in charge of our household budget, but as certain family members can attest, that has not been exactly a raging success. I will also say that I am guilty of being a credit card abuser. It got so bad I finally cut up all our cards (except 1 with a very low interest rate and low max allowance) that can be used in "emergencies". So, I tell you this so you will know that I can certainly relate to the feeling of drowning in one's own debt and being desperate for a lifeline.

So now our wonderful financial wizards on Wall Street have overspent and "had a big party" and now we must pay. But are they willing to extend the financial goodwill to the regular folks who took out loans they had every intention of paying back but got screwed by ARMs? Fat chance. Now look, I know there are arguments on both sides saying "people who took out more than they could afford shouldn't be "bailed out". Ahem, isn't that what our country has become based on?? Credit??? And why, then, are we bailing out the "predatory lenders" whose greed put us in this situation to begin with? So who profits (literally) once again....? ? The predators. And We the People are supposed to sit back and take it up the you-know-where (see Blog title).

Let me share with you an excerpt from a study guide I am using to prepare for my upcoming teaching skills test....this is a description of the causes of the French Revolution, and to some degree the American Revolution. The point is, the people revolted when they were basically sick of being screwed.

"...the increased criticism (as a result of the Enlightenment period) directed toward government inefficiency and corruption, and toward the privileged classes...the 'First Estate' and 'Second Estates' (nobility and clergy), representing only two percent of the total population...the 'Third Estate' (working class and everybody else), who bore the entire burden of taxation and the imposition of feudal obligations. As economic conditions worsened...and the French state became poorer and totally dependent on the poorest and most (economically) depressed sections of the economy for support at the very time the tax base had become separated.....This in turn produced a government that was irresponsible and inefficient, with a tax system that was unjust and inequitable and without any means of redress because of the absence of any meaningful representative assembly."

Now, I ask you. Does this sound familiar? That old expression "if one does not know their history, they are doomed to repeat it?" And isn't Sarah Palin asking us to "forget our past" just move forward? Ignore the man behind the curtain. Who cares what causes global warming, let's just fix it? (like, I have no idea why my car broke down, just fix it...the causes are moot).

I am so disgusted with so many things right now. It is hard for me to focus on my studies or anything else. We are entering another Great Depression, but for some, the depression will run much deeper. My mom has already shared stories from folks in the news (a 90 year old woman who, faced with foreclosure and eviction shot herself and is now critically wounded..and homeless in the hospital.....a young couple who borrowed more than they could pay back and faced with possible prison sentences chose instead to commit suicide); regular people, good people, well-intentioned people who just got caught beyond their means trying to make things work and they're not here anymore. Just like in the Great Depression when men jumped from their office windows because the despair was too big to handle.

Like the Titanic, we have only touched the tip of the iceberg. We are sinking in despair, and being led by inept government representation (sorry Congress, you blew this one)and , Oh goody! It's now time to elect a new president, who will be saddled with one of the biggest clusterf**k administration messes we have ever known. Poor Obama. I hope he wins, he NEEDS to win.

The day here is gray, and apparently it reflects how I think most of us feel. REVOLUTION PEOPLE!!!!

P.S. OJ was convicted...big whoop....